Don’t be a vigilante! 2 Samuel chapter 13

The most destructive behavior we can do is the stuff we can easily justify. When someone does something terrible to us or especially to someone we love, we can be guilty of some of the most heinous crimes and uncompassionate thoughts without even batting an eyelid. Sometimes these acts can even be applauded by those around us, further cementing the delusion that we are in the right.

When Tamar was abused, it was a horrific crime, one unfortunately that is all too common today. But Absalom killing her attacker was worse not just because it broke the 6^th commandment but because it was in retaliation. When revenge is the motive we blind ourselves to the crime. Cries of ‘He got want he deserved’ which echo around this story, make us feel like we are the hero when in reality we have just become the villain.

I am as guilty of this as the next person, I love movies involving revenge, and Hollywood has convinced me that it is imperative to our sense of right and wrong that the bad guy always gets 'it' in the end! Even in our compassionate gospel narrative we long for the justice part for everyone else – while anticipating the mercy part for ourselves.

Being a vigilante is often hard to see because we mask it in so much perceived justification.  We retell our story with such self righteousness that we convince ourselves that we are acting with the best intentions. In the process we make vigilantes of those around us, as others take up the cause on our behalf.

The most common form of vigilantism is gossip, - the deliberate telling of an event to highlight wrong, insight distrust or destroy confidence. We may unwittingly cause great harm as other trust our bias take on the situation.

One of the most public vigilante acts of our time is the assassination of Osama Bin Laden.  People danced in the streets, hugged loved ones, waved flags and proclaimed ‘He got what he deserved’. Only a small voice said – ‘where is the trial? Where is the jury? – this was public sanctioned murder, we have let our fear take over our reason yet again’.

So how do we stop? First we need to catch ourselves…. If we say or think ‘(s)he’ll get what (s)he deserves’ we are already on the way to being a vigilante. Second ask the question ‘what am I afraid of’, fear that justice will not be met is the basis for revenge. Third pray for better understanding and courage to act with love. Fourth trust the rest to the Lord.

Tamar is assalted by her half brother and then thrown out.

Who is the Villain? 2 Samuel chapter 12

The Old Testament is often a roller coaster of drama. One moment the people are up next they are down, the lines between Hero and Villain get very blurred. David appeared to be Israel’s savior and yet he ended up being part of their problem. When Nathan the prophet challenged  his perspective David understood himself as the villain.

David is not alone, whether it is presidents, sporting fixtures, celebrities, community leaders, teachers, or our own family - we have plenty of examples of fallen stars.

While we respond to the ideas of Hero’s and Villain’s in our just and ordered world, it is never quite that simple. This ‘us and them’ mentality is not reality. We are all children of God, we are all here to learn and we all get things wrong. We have a tendency to minimize our mistakes and maximize others, to write our story as just and theirs as unjust, in the process justifying our behavior no matter how terrible or unfair.

But finding out you are the villain is often the best thing that can happen to you, especially if you realize it before you do something really dumb. Understanding the fact that you are the villain can free you to really love, and work in partnership with the Lord. It will make way for mercy to overcome the demands of justice, rescue you from yourself, and ironically make you the conquering hero after all.

While David’s sin was almost the worse it could be, he spent the rest of his life striped of pride, begging for forgiveness, and doing all he could to rectify his mistake and the ramifications of his actions. He would need the Lord – so do we all.

Nathan helps David realize his need for repentance.

Vulnerability: 2 Samuel 11

The tale of David and Bathsheba has many modern day parallels and lessons: - Make sure that you are in the right place doing the right things; avoid pornographic or salacious material, one bad choice links onto another one, and many others, maybe this one also.

David was unparalleled on the battlefield. Where Saul was afraid, David was invincible. But on the home front David had some weaknesses. What underpinned his great transgression was his fear at home. David decided to stay away from the battle, take a holiday spend time with his large and possibly demanding family. He was used to feeling important and in charge, but at home he was just another part of the process and perhaps even a burden. He excelled so much at his work that his home life paled in comparison. Despite his great family blessings – he didn’t feel very grateful. So he went up on the rooftop….

We all have this same experience, times when we don’t feel particularly engaged in what we are doing, when we are tired, lost, alone, or disappointed in where we are at. It is at these moments we are the most vulnerable, prone to temptation, seeking a thrill or a feeling of entitlement. In our boredom or apathy we may indulge our fears with a temporary but instant gratification, which may have long lasting consequences and addictions.

Being aware of you vulnerability is key to mastering it. When we fear it we do dumb things trying to prove that we are tough, invincible, important, often at the expense of our best selves and the relationships around us. But when we embrace it, we rely on the Lord and find His strength and perspective to move forward, we find compassion because we are compassionate of others, and we find hope as we recognize in others and ourselves - love supplanting our doubt.

Have a look at this inspiring TED talk on Vulnerability

David sees Bathsheba

Understanding the Atonement: 1 Samuel 25

The Atonement of the Savior is what we base our belief around. Most of the time we talk about how the atonement helps us to repent, gives us the opportunity to make up in some way for what we have done wrong, and for Christ and his infinite sacrifice to envelope us in the arms of mercy, restoring us to our whole.

What we don’t talk about as much is the Atonements ability to help us to forgive those wrongs which have been done or perceived to be done against us.

David in exile asks for provisions of the wealthy farmer Nabal. David and his men had helped his servants and now asked for some assistance. Word came to David that Nabal had refused his petition. David was aggrieved and resolved with his men to come up and slay Nabal and all the men in his household. Nabal’s wife Abigail was told of the situation and quickly gathered provisions and went to intercept David before he reached the house.

When Abagail found David she fell at his feet and begged for his forgiveness,  not for Nabal her husband but for herself. Her fervent plea and her obvious innocence moved David, his heart was changed in an instant, he realized he was about to do something terrible, it was him that needed forgiveness. 

Likewise the Savior comes to us in our moments of hurt and begs us to forgive him. The absurdity of forgiving the perfect Christ hopefully can move us to the kind of humility necessary to allow us to let it go. In which case we see our own need for forgiveness and not require the repentance of others for our own healing to happen.

In this way we can be free.

Abigail begs David to forgive her.

Fear: 1 Samuel 9-24

We make bad decisions when we are afraid. We try to take control of things that we are not meant to control, we justify choices that are not great, we lay blame and we treat others as the problem rather than part of the reason for why we are doing things in the first place.

Saul was a ‘choice young man and among the children of Israel there was not a goodlier person’, conscious of his humble beginnings and the big responsibility before him. He was also a spiritual man, cared about others, prone to inspiration and prophesy, and conscious of his partnership with the Lord in leading Israel. So with that great beginning as a King, where did he go wrong? Same place we all do - Fear.

In the battle against the Philistines the people were running scared, hiding in caves, fleeing as fast as they could. King Saul was on the battlefront waiting for Samuel to come and offer the sacrifice that would sanction Israel in this new war. When Samuel was delayed, Saul began to be afraid, he justified making the sacrifice himself, he was after all the anointed one. As soon as he had done so Samuel turned up and reproved the new King, he had overstepped his authority and it would eventually end his continuing right to the kingdom.

It’s easily to judge Saul harshly but let’s look at it from Saul’s point of view. His people were under threat of death, crying to him in the harrowing of their souls, to make matters worse soldiers were dissenting all over the place. They were looking to him for answers, and as their king he felt particularly responsible. He knew he needed the Lord, but Samuel the prophet was nowhere to be found and the situation was getting worse by the hour. If the imminent battle came, they were very unprepared, because the sacrifice had not been made, the people would despair and the loss could be catastrophic, he could lose it all. He had to act.

Knowing what to do when you are afraid is challenging. Fear takes you out of your right mind, puts you into flight or fight mode. Some fear is ongoing, gnawing, like not feeling like you have enough, some fear is intense like being in danger. Fear will push you to the edge, and even beyond.

Once fear has you it is relentless. In David, Saul sought relief from his fear, David’s harp playing calmed him and his courage on the battlefield saved the Kingdom. But when the people revered David above Saul and whispered of his anointing under the hand of Samuel, and when his own son liked David more and his daughter Michal wanted to marry him. David went from Saul’s savior to his greatest enemy. To Saul, David was the personification of all he feared. By ridding himself of David maybe he could finally be free. So he sought to banish him and when that didn’t change anything he unsuccessfully tried to hunt him down to kill him. Sauls fear blinded him to the love that was on offer.

In contrast David sought every opportunity to be at peace with Saul. Even with Saul seeking his death, he respected that he was the Lords anointed and he would not lift his hand against him. David loved the Lord, and trusted that He was looking out for him.

This powerful relationship between the two kings gives an amazing insight into how fear distorts our perception of what is going on. How we can end up fighting against the very thing that will bless us the most. But most importantly despite the worse possible situations if we have faith and love the Lord can lead us through our challenges to great blessings.  As John in the New Testament wrote “ Perfect love casteth out fear”.

Saul mistakes David as his enemy.

Politics of Power: Samuel 8

As Samuel ages and his children take over judging Israel their corruption worries the people. They seek for a King to rule over them. Samuel under the direction of the Lord warns them against such a course. He rehearses the dangers, servitude, taxation, war to increase boundaries (not just defense) and with it the conscription of their young men, they would belong to the King and be subject to his will. But the people are not dissuaded. They feel that under a King Israel will be more united and able to defend itself against its neighbors.  It would put them on equal footing with the nations around them, and give them a figurehead for which they could turn to in their need. Their fear means they are willing to trade their very unique God given freedoms, for their perceived security.

To be fair their system of government in the Promised Land had been unpredictable. Sometimes they had great Judges who were the means of mighty and miraculous deliverance, but oft times they spent many long years in subjection to surrounding nations and abject poverty. There were civil wars among the tribes and great disparity of wealth. While the children of Israel were wandering and led by Moses, their freedom was limited but consistent. In this new land with the personal freedoms that went with it, greater responsibility also meant greater troubles, people chose other than the Lord and captivity ensued.  Maybe a king would be a better option?

Actually they were partly right. With the kings came some great victories over their enemies, Israel was established as an important region of power and respect. Wealth improved and quality of life increased. But as Israel increased its borders it also needed more of its young men to maintain its conquests. The kings revered and worshiped, required tribute from the people to support a higher lifestyle, and required servants to keep this preeminence. Their lives were at the whim and direction of a King who often became more self-absorbed and mentally unstable.  Samuel’s predictions all came true.

One cannot help but draw striking parallels between ancient Israel and modern America. A new nation set up in a Promised Land, under the hand of God, with defined personal rights and a system of government designed to minimize a concentration of power.  This nation of collected tribes (states), went through inter-tribe conflicts and civil war, then united under a common flag, enlarged its borders through wars and treaties, taxing its people, concentration power and worshiping its figureheads. 

It is an interesting question to ask: Where in Israel’s lifecycle is America right now? What’s next?

Samuel annoints Saul King

The process of Conversion within the Church: Samuel 3

Samuel who has spent some time in service in the temple and under the direction of Eli, is awoken by a voice calling his name. He rushes to Eli’s side to enquire what he wants, Eli replies that he did not call him and instructs Samuel to go back to bed. The voice calls again, and again Samuel runs to Eli, and is meet with the same response. When the voice calls for the third time, and again Samuel goes to Eli, Eli realizes that it is the Lord and instructs Samuel to reply to the voice of the Lord. When he does, the young man receives revelation and a calling to lead Israel.

Growing up in the church, conversion can often follow this same pattern. A young man or woman, under the direction of righteous parents and mentors, learns and grows in the gospel.  They attend service projects, serve in the priesthood and young women’s , achieve in YW in excellence and Duty to God, often feeling uplifted by firesides and camps, lessons and conferences, attending the temple and helping in the ward.  They have a feeling that what they are doing is good, and when the witness of the Spirit attends they look to leaders and parents for validation. It is a wise mentor that can direct that person to the source and help them anchor to the Lord.

The Lord desires to connect with us individually and directly. While the influences of parents and leaders are useful they must ultimately fade to the background. Once Samuel had been called and qualified he was in a position to take over from Eli and provide spiritual direction for Israel. Likewise the lifeblood of the church is the ongoing process of young men and women making their own connection to the Head.

If our lives are to be of greatest use to the Lord we must have Him as our source.

Samuel hears the Lord but in his inexperience thinks it is Eli